Vikings, cyborgs and futility

So it was another humdrum day here in the rushing gorge of futility (where I now reside). I watched sports tv again (where apparently the Steelers travel plans were a hot topic of debate for some reason) and then watched some more tv, most of which I had seen before. Ohh yeah, I'm living large.

I did read some of this book League of the Damned by William Dietz and will probably finish it tonight. It's about future warfare against a hostile alien race and somehow the French Foreign Legion is still intact and partially populated with cyborgs. I'm rating it a Meh. now, as I doubt it will get better.

I'm hoping the week improves. Trip and I are going to see The Hold Steady in Chapel Hill on Thurday and, of course, there is the Super Bowl. I do have to say if the Steelers lose I'm gonna be pretty damned stunned for quite a while.

I'm now listening to Borknagar, which is best described as a "viking metal" band. I've been hanging out at last.fm and listening to some of their radio stuff, which is interesting. I have to say this isn't my favorite music, but I do sometimes miss listening to metal and need a fix of something interesting.

I'm sorry you can't have any more food

So it was Trip's B-Day today so he, Corb and myself got together and hit the sushi place, which was an adventure. The guy who owns the place seems to have bitten off more than he can chew and the service is suspect. At one point the waitress told Trip that they were out of crab, so he didn't get his complete order. When he tried to get a substitude for his crab sushi she told him the guy wasn't taking any more orders?!?? I enjoyed the food, but it's kinda ridiculous how long it took... not to mention the look of bafflement on the waitress when she was ringing us up. That was scary.

I finished reading William Gibson's Virtual Light, which is not really my favorite of his works. It's pretty good, but he sets a really high standard with his other books. I'm giving it a +1 chainmail rating. I think it might also help if I knew the correct order to read his books in as well, since some of them share characters.

Anyway tomorrow is the first Sunday without football in a while and I'm not sure how I'm gonna adjust. I got one more week after that and then it's the long haul, where I have to fend for myself. Hopefully I'll have a job soon and all this free time will be accounted for properly.

Think I'll wear my Columbian Necktie

So Trip and I watched The Aristocrats tonight, which is a documentary on this incredibly dirty joke. Actually it doesn't have to be dirty...well... unless you want it to be interesting, then it does. But yeah, it's a bunch of comedians telling this joke, each in their own unique manner and it's magnificent.

When Doug Standhope tells his version, whooooo, Trip and I couldn't stop laughing. It was soooo filthy, ohh it was horrendous. Oh and he was telling it to his infant son, which made it even funnier. Gilbert Gottfried and Bob Saget were also awesome (never thought I'd be saying that sentence, I can tell ya). I'm saying it's a filet mignon movie, at least after one watch.

So I'm listening to this rocking band Boris now. It sounds like Black Sabbath and My Bloody Valentine got together and had a Japanese baby that rocks hard (in a shoe-gazey way, sometimes). It's thumping, I can tell ya, killer guitars. That's me bringing you word of the odd Japanese metal band, I'm not afriad of it.

Hip slang

The new cool word in Ericville is Ufia. I will be threatening people with these for a while.

Paint drying and flies fucking

So I lead the most boring life. All I did today was watch sports talk (listening to how great my Steelers are) and fiddle on the internet. That's it... I'm sad. I spent like an hour playing this lame game. I miss WoW, but refuse to get it back until after I have a job and am settled. In the interim I may go crazy. I did play a little Need For Speed Underground 2, but it's hard to play for extended periods.

I did watch How I Met Your Mother and yeah, it's kind of a girly show overall. Lots of dating and romance talk, but what can I say? I love it. It's got good dialogue, hot chicks and Neil Patrick Harris, can you ask for more?

Hey on top of being terminally boring, my Jeep is acting up. Isn't that a kick in the crotch. Anyway I'm gonna go finish watching the first season of Arrested Development and then maybe do some reading.

The very essence of bliss.  

SUPER BOWL!

Hell yeah, Pittsburgh in the Super Bowl. Oh shit I'm happy. It's our year, we're gonna win this one. Jerome Bettis is gonna get his ring. Number six seed coming through on the road beating the three, two and one seeds in their own houses.

I don't know which team I want to face. Both are pretty good. I think we'd match up better against Seattle, just because they are more run oriented. Also Steve Smith is dangerous. Ahh fuck it, I don't care bring em on. We're going to Detroit!!!!!

Down to the wire

I'm coming in with my last minute picks for today's games. I'm obviously picking Pittsburgh, how can I do anything less? It's gonna be close, but the Steelers have more weapons I think, particularly on defense. In the other game I'm really torn. I think I'm picking Seattle. The loss of Foster does make a difference, even though Nick Goings is a decent back. This one is also close, but I'm going with the home team.

I am a heathen

Argh I'm sick of waiting. I emailed the paper in Danville about the job I applied for there and got an email back telling me they just started the process. I haven't heard anything about the job in Roanoke and I'm antsy. I want to work. I got kinda defensive tonight when Trip and Corb asked me about it, but I really am trying and am feeling helpless. So that sucks.

Anyway, here is a report on movies I've watched lately. I watched Hero tonight with Trip and that is still really good (Filet Mignon). The use of colors and scenery is inspiring. It may be better than Crouching Tiger (Filet Mignon), although it's close.

I watched American Pie's Band Camp last night and it's everything you'd expect. That's right, it sucks outright (Mudbutt). It has some boobs, although none that were noteworthy, in my opinion. Trip and I also watched Sahara yesterday and whew, that movie was awful. A convoluted storyline, dull action sequences and a soundtrack that did not seem to fit with the movie at all. It too receives notice for it's Mudbutt nature.

Yeah, I think this photo says it all. 

You ain't got it like I got it

Woo, so I spent the afternoon watching Arrested Development, Season 1. Man is that show funny. I swear, it's awesome. Such an amazing cast and soooo well written. It's a small wonder most people don't get it, it's not dumbed down.

Now I'm watching a South Park episode that I haven't seen. Cartman thinks he's dead.

You know I really don't have anything else to say. I am that dull. Sheesh. Hope I hear from one of those jobs soon.

Nessie, the savior of my nitelife

I have decided my new pickup line will be "Do you think the Loch Ness Monster is real?" That's high quality conversation starting. It is a varient on M. Doughty's genius piece "Do you like robots?" Is it wrong that these thoughts come to me when I'm laying on the sofa watching crap?

I managed to salvage some of my day by watching The Life Aquatic. I LOVE! Wes Anderson and his movies. They are the best. Wonderful tales of faded glory and father issues wrapped in an almost dreamlike world. Magnificent. The cast was amazing and, of course, Bill Murray is a genius.

Inspired by Stephen Colbert's Dead to me list, I have decided to do my own I wish they would die list. I'm sure that sounds harsh to some of you, but I'm coming strong. No halfstepping here, although I will only be listing celebrities on this list and no one else for fear of backlash. Also for legal reasons this is only a hope, there will be no actions taken to this effect by me. My inaction is guaranteed.

Anyway members of my list include: Pat Robertson (chart-toppingly annoying!), Uwe Boll, Terrell Owens, Zell Miller, Anne Coulter, Celine Dion, Scott Stapp and the people who run the oil companies (yeah that's probably half the current presidential administration and their cronies). That's all that's coming to me at the moment, although I am 100-percent certain there are considerably more that need to be added. I'll come back for them. Feel free to make suggestions, I always blank out when I'm doing a list.

Complete waste of space

So my WoW account is cancelled but I still don't have a job yet. That leaves me with an absurd amount of time and no safety valve for it. This afternoon has been brutal. I watched King of the Hill for fuck's sake! I'm becoming a vegetable! Help me!

I mean I was ok watching all the football stuff on ESPN for most of the afternoon, but the football coverage is dwindling. Tomorrow it'll be all NBA oriented, yesh. I understand Hunter S. Thompson's final letter at these moments.

I need me some frontbutt

Well I'll start with some odds and ends before moving into football-speak. First off, I watched Oldboy last night, which was an odd film. Odd. It's a Korean movie about a guy who gets picked up off the street and imprisoned for 15 years. Not by a government or anything, just some odd people grab him and keep him. It gets weirder from there. It had some cool images, including a nice torture sequence and a fight with a hammer. I'm saying +1 chainmail, but not recommending it for the weak of heart.

I forgot to mention I was reading John Berendt's The City of Falling Angels. He's the guy who wrote Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil (which I never read, but the movie was good). Anyway this time Berendt is in Venice and goes on and on about it. While some of it was interesting, by page 200 or so I was tired of hearing about the squabbles of rich Europeans and expatriates. So I gave it up. If I was forced to rate it despite my lack of completing it I'd say it straddles the line between Meh. and Shaq-fu.

On to football. I would like to now brag that I was a perfect 4-0 in my picks on the weekend. All bow before my skills. Honestly I woulda been happy with a 1-3 record if that one win was Pittsburgh. But I'm hoping to continue my streak next week (hint: I'm picking Pittsburgh).

I'm rooting for both road teams next week. Obviously I'm dedicated to the Steelers, but I'd like to see Carolina pound the Seahawks as well. I've hated Seattle for a long time for purely idiosyncratic reasons. I've only met two Seahawks fans in my entire life and both of them annoyed me, one to the point of hoping he dies slowly and painfully. I blame him for making me hate them.

But yeah, Steve Smith is gonna be a pain for them to stop. He made the Bears' D look inept and I hear they have a little talent. Does Seattle have that kinda defense? I dunno, I haven't seen enough of em to know. Watching them stop the Redskins' offense wasn't that inspiring (those guys need a #2 receiver really bad). I suppose they could turn it into a shootout. I dunno, I'm not prepped to make picks yet, well picks that don't involve Pittsburgh.

Cocksucking refs can't stop Steeltown

That's right, those pricks did everything they could to steal that game from us, but we managed to hang on. I nearly destroyed my living room watching the game. I swear, when Bettis fumbled late I almost pushed my couch through a wall. The Steelers lose that game and I may have went into a coma (from banging my head against the wall).

Anyway, the Steelers did win and head to Denver next week. Both teams coming off emotional wins, it could go either way. Playing in Mile High (or Invesco or whatever it is now) is not gonna be easy. Pittsburgh has to bounce back and get ready to go. I know The Bus will be happy to get a chance to carry the ball again. His final carry couldn't be a game-losing fumble, it just wouldn't be right. I'm hoping his final play is a kneel down with Pittsburgh beating Carolina in the Super Bowl with ease.

Pick it, don't flick it

So before the games start I will go on record with my picks for the weekend. This is tough cause there are a ton of really close games this weekend.

• Washington at Seattle - This game is tough, but I think the Seahawks will win. I hate the Seahawks for a variety of not good reasons and am actually rooting for the Skins. Nonetheless the week off for Seattle and travel time of the Skins makes it hard to see them coming through with the win.
• New England at Denver - This one is maybe the hardest to pick for me. Denver beat them earlier this season and that makes the Pats even more dangerous, since noone beats them twice in a year. However the trip to Mile High coupled with depleted secondary of New England forces me to pick the Broncos.
• Pittsburgh at Indianapolis - I'm a complete homer on this one. Pittsburgh is gonna win. It's gonna be close, but you just don't beat the Steelers twice in a season, even in Indy. Also the Colts haven't played in soo long it's gonna be hard for em to get back into thier midseason form.
  
• Carolina at Chicago - Another close one, but I'm going with Carolina. The Panthers have looked like a team peaking at the right time. Also the Bears defense is truly great, but the offense is truly terrible. Also Rex Grossman has absolutely no playoff experience, he's gonna look bad with Julius Peppers applying pressure.
  

Anyway there are the picks I'll be belittled for come Monday.

St. Smythins Medical Facility and Pork Sausage Distillery

So I had my interview today and it went pretty well. I wore a tie and played nice and the guy seemed like a decent human being. The job is working master control at the Fox and WB stations in Roanoke. I kinda got the idea that the job is one that is not overly demanding mentally, but who cares. I gotsta get paid! Maybe I can work my way up the Fox ladder and get in good with Rupert Murdoch and turn him liberal! Or if he refuses to turn assassinate him.

*Realizes he doesn't have a job yet.* Ummmm, I'm kidding, I will do nothing to upset my future Fox overlord's wishes or threaten his life in anyway.

I ended up spending the whole damn day in Roanoke, most of it in a coffee shop re-reading Pattern Recognition, which is awesome. I think I'm moving it up into the headcavingly orgasmic ranks. This is a relatively quick move into the "Hall of Fame" but it is well deserved.

But yeah Kev offered to buy me dinner and so I ended up hanging out with him and his coworkers and that was cool. Sadly I didn't get to hook up with Adam, but if things go well I'll be up there a lot and we'll have plenty more chances. I am kinda beat now tho. That commute is gonna be a stunner, I know that.

What's done is done

So I discovered this band Xiu Xiu recently and while they are anything but conventional I am enthralled. There is this song Ale, that's so heartbreaking, it literally brought tears to my eyes. This song is very minimal, woodwind sounds a voice filled with sorry, anger and resignation. It's really amazing. I know some aren't really into sad music, I understand it's the equivalent of a tearjerking movie (although usually not as long). But if you are down, check it out.

Also this tidbit for Nick, I heard someone describe The Hold Steady as sounding like Counting Crows. I admit this isn't my first comparison, but I know how crazy you are for the Crows and maybe I can get you into a band I'm loving. I feel sure that the Hold Steady are a little more about the darker side (drugs and whatnot), but there honestly is some Christian influence there. Seems like being on drugs can make you seek out salvation. Anyway I'm just here to inform, you can choose to act or not as you see fit. No pressure.

Anyway tomorrow is my big interview and I'm hopeful. I still have to weave my shirt and whatnot, but I feel good. I can do whatever needs doing.

Bored and single

Man I've been terminally bored all day. I found no respite. I tried to play WoW and felt stunned, I tried Jade Empire and couldn't get into it. I even pulled out NBA Street V3 for a little mindless flavor. Nothing. I dunno. I think I just wanna fast forward the week to Friday so I can do this interview I got in Roanoke. Probably gonna be antsy til that goes down.

I've been reading the original X-Men comics lately and man, 60s comic dialogue is highly contrived. Also I would like to nominate the Angel for being the lamest X-man of all time. I've been skimming a lot of em just to get through em until they develop into a more captivating story line.

Ohh more good news! My friend Noel from college is getting married. Nobody deserves to be loved more than Noel, he's one of the best guys ever. Of course this marks another name off my ever-shortening list of single friends. If this continues I could be the last single person on earth in my age bracket. I'm gonna try to not focus on it.

Anyway tomorrow is my last day with WoW and part of me wants to play that, but another part of me knows that I should get the hell out of the house. I'm torn.

Sitting there playing clutch butt

Well I discovered my Xbox isn't what's broken, it's the VCR I run my XBox through that has the problem. Sadly this means I can't watch DVDs except for on my computer. Alas. I suppose I'll live, but it is annoying.

I have made an executive decision to stop playing WoW for a while. Just until I get my shit together with real life. Honestly if things go as I hope I won't have time to dedicate to it and paying for it anyway would be dumb. This will also help me put forth time instead of regressing into my fantasy land. Still I'm gonna miss my online friends, they are cool people.

Lots of new music to discuss, which if you've clicked on my new music link over there you can see it all. I'll start with Morningwood (which is fairly standard for me, OH!... sorry) which has some really good tracks on it, but the album is uneven. The four good tracks are foot massage worthy, but the rest of the album is a decided Meh., so we end up with a +1 chainmail rating.

Ummm, got a coupla Spoon albums that I'm still deciding how much I like. They are good, but I can't decide if they are gonna become regulars in my playlists. I'm liking this Xiu Xiu album I got, but it's slow, noisy and off kilter, so I probably wouldn't recommend it to most of the people who read this blog.

The way he wore it made it look more like a tourniquet

Last night I was floating through the ether of cyberspace when I discovered something cool. It's a site that keeps track of all the songs I listen to on my computer. It's pretty badass. I'll be linking it in on the side panel there when I get around to it, but for those of you in a hurry to see bands you most likely aren't familiar with here is the link to my profule at Last.fm.

Obviously it's far too soon to see the grand scheme of my listening. It's currently kinda slanted toward a lot of new bands I've been trying on lately, as opposed to the bands I tend to listen to more often. It'll pan out. Anyway with the addition of that link I will no longer be doing the What I'm listening to thing at the beginning of posts. I'm evolving.

Last night I watched I (Heart) Huckabees. I don't know the keystroke for the actual heart, but whatever. It was pretty good (foot massage) in a quirky way. It had a bit of a Wes Anderson feel, but with a more modern look and didn't have his usual themes of faded glory. But it had a kickass cast and some very nice existential discussion.

Tonight I headed to Trip's for How I Met Your Mother and various other entertainments. We ended up watching a history channel show on the history of marijuana in the U.S. It's funny to note that most of the War on Drugs started from laws used to keep minorities marginalized. That's not liberal propaganda, that's fact.

It's hard for me to understand why our government can't learn from it's past mistakes. We banned alcohol, it didn't turn out well and so we legalized it again, but legislated it a certain way. Couldn't you do the same damn thing with drugs? I dunno, I could go on a tirade, but I'm gonna let it go. It's just one small example of the stupidity of a large beauracracy run by rich, white people.

Who dey? Nobody really.

Woooooooo! Is there anything better than watching the Steelers win a playoff game? I suppose if I was in the stadium... and got to have sex with a Bengals cheerleader on the 50-yard line at the half. That might be better, but this is pretty damn sweet too.

The only problem was now we have to hear about how Carson Palmer wasn't in the game. Pittsburgh was gonna win anyway, but they'll be whining. Anyway next week it's the Colts. I'm hoping they can't bounce back from all the late season strife. Pittsburgh is definitely dangerous and can win that game. Ahh another week of life in the playoffs. Lovin it.

Get up, stand up

Now listening to: Iron & Wine/Calexico (In the Reins)

So I tooled up to Roanoke today to watch some football with Adam and his boys, Had a really good time, but man it's a haul up and back. But yeah, we had fun. The Redskins game was pretty good. I was kinda rooting for the Skins, just cause I hate John Gruden. Not really sure why I do, I just do.

The second game was kinda dull. I don't normally have trouble watching football, but I really didn't give a shit about the Jags or the Pats. I wish the Jaguars would have won, just so I wouldn't have to hear more about New England. But I would have never picked Jacksonville in Foxboro. His friends bailed and we just sat there and talked through most of the game, well and watched all the high school girls wander around. I know I'm too old for em, but what can I say? My eyes wander.

The ride home wasn't too bad, but it was kinda cold. Now I'm just chilling and listening to some mellow tunes. I'm gonna reserve my energy for tomorrow's Steeler game. I'm really nervous about it. On paper I think the Steelers should win, but the Bengals have been awful quiet. I suppose it all comes down to the running game.

Gimme the ol' rusty trombone

Now watching: Colbert Report rerun

So I've been watching the new Daily Shows and man are they awesome. Lots of good ammunition after a month off. I mean this administration gives us something laughable each week, so a month of stuff is ludicrous. Also the "Coot off" was hysterical. I love it that those ancient old white men are the only people we can find to run our government. Oh wait, no I don't.

Moving along, I've been listening to the new ...and you will know us by the trail of dead album and Sleater-Kinney almost exclusively. They are both really, really awesome. I know most of you people have never heard of either band, much less listened to em, but you should. I decree it!

I suppose that's all for now. Have a good weekend. Or don't whatever.

Paging Dr. Benway

Now listening to: Tortoise

Spent the last coupla days vegging and watching college football. Fun to see Penn State pull one out over FSU. Watched the National Championship game tonight and Vince Young could not be stopped. Pretty awesome to watch. Still it's hard to believe that football season is coming to a close. I mean, sure, there are the NFL playoffs but that's it. And it's a long cold winter after that.

Trip tells me I take football too seriously, and I may, but I really love it. I love it more with each passing year. Fantasy football has only added to my mania. However, of all my obsessions, this is the one I have the biggest chance of making work for me professionally. I mean, I'd love to write about video games, but if you aren't in San Francisco or Seattle and willing to work as an intern for two years (aka volunteer) it ain't gonna happen. (Also Japanese language skills are a plus.) On the other hand there is a sports writer or three in every single town across the nation.

Not much else is going on really. I'm looking for a job and hoping the one I'm sniffing now will pan out. Not gonna say much about it until it does, so as to not increase my humiliation should I not get it.

New WoW patch came out this week too, so I've been involved with that playing too much really. I also watched Shaun of the Dead again and it's still good. I borrowed a bunch of DVDs from Kevin to keep me occupied, but my XBox is in the process of dying. It still plays games, but the DVD player is fucked. Another reason to hope I get that job. Anyway I'm off to read Hellboy comics. Ta.

Way to go lunchbox

Man I slept like a damn rock last night. Trip and I went to hang with Kev yesterday and we had a good time. Hit the Noke for some chinese and shopping. I gotta be honest, I'm sick of watching other people shop while I'm broke. I've got to get paid man... gotta. Anyway we ultimately headed back to Kev's place to chill and have dinner. Hung with Courtney and Eve when they got in. Eve's a little cutie. Could it be my tolerance for children is growing? I dunno, maybe in short bursts.

But yeah I didn't get much sleep the night before and when I got up at 9 a.m. it was painful. The rain and gloom didn't help perk me up. So when I got home around 9 p.m. I crashed out until around 10 a.m. today. Whew a nice 13 hour nap.

One of the things hanging with Eve made me think of was words you can say to insult your friends around a small child that you won't get into trouble if they repeat. So far I've come up with are teabag, lunchbox, fairy and nancy.

New year, new season

Now watching: Redskins-Eagles

The Steelers managed to stave off a surging Lions team (who thought they'd show up?) and are now in the playoffs. Woohoo! Next week we head to Cincinnati and look to show them who's the real team in the AFC North. Of course to do that the defense will need to look better on third down than it did today. (Not that I actually watched the game, but I followed it play-by-play online). Too many time the lowly Lions would convert on third-and-long. We need to stifle Cincinnati!

My New Year's Eve was low key. Trip and I went to see The Ringer, which was ok, but not great. I'm gonna say +1 chainmail for Brian Cox and some amusing moments. We then had dinner at IHOP and came home. No big whoop. I did pickup The Life Aquatic on DVD for $4, which is nice. Gotta love Wes Anderson and Bill Murray.

Anyway, tomorrow Trip and I are heading up to spend the day with Kevin. Should be cool, but I gotta not spend money. I'm way poor.